OOO = Out of Office
for Oophorectomy. An oophorectomy is the removal of the ovaries and I'll be waving bye bye to mine this week. They've been causing me some gyp since last Summer and as a 50 year old peri-menopausal woman I don't NEED them anymore. Or do I? Because I do need oestrogen but that's not what this blog is about so I'll save that for another time.
This blog is for all of us who were "invited" in for a "procedure" and felt stripped of our personality as well as thrust into the what do I wear, what don't I wear debacle of knowing at some point you'll be bare and on display. Now if you're reading and thinking 'how vain' bear with me because admittedly vanity does play a part but it's not just that. Or maybe it is. Mostly.
WARNING - if you are my mum or my MIL I am talking about pubic hair too so look away now if you'd rather not know.
When I talk about staying stylish I mean staying true to your authentic style, where you are in your comfort zone. I'm not talking about strutting into the clinic in your Louboutins, your Jackie O Sunglasses and your Chanel two piece darling, no! Some of us will find it harder than others when we are tasked with dressing comfortably or approapriately for something that is just not everyday to us.
As a Romantic I am much more at home with a bit of makeup, a heel, carefully co-ordinated pieces which others might think is a bit over the top for Tesco. I really don't mind looking overdressed. I'm at my most uncomfortable when asked to dress "casual". I'm immediately uncomfortable at the thought of flat shoes, jeans, a tee or a hoody. Call it vanity if you will but it just isn't me. So imagine the thought process late last year when invited for an ultrasound. Hmmmm, so I know I will have to strip from the waist down. I don't want to lie bare legged in socks. I'll take the socks off too. Oh and I don't want to feel exposed across my middle. If I wear a dress I can just hoik it up and it's much easier to get dressed again. But if I do wear a dress then I need to wear my long boots - they'll definitely have to come off.
Any woman who has been for a smear test will undergo the thought processes for dressing in the easiest way possible for the procedure whilst balancing how this might look. If you are the woman that does not give the slightest hoot then I salute you. If like me you do all this and also have the pubic hair discussion with yourself then read on. Luckily for an ultrasound the pubic hair situation is unimportant but imagine if the ultrasound is showing something and it's decided you need an internal scan.
"Errmmm ok yes then I've waited ages for the appointment so I will stay for the scan. But errrr ........ I haven't 'prepared'. "
The radiographer says "Oh don't worry, Nobody cares about that any more". Don't they?
And if you do know you're going to be airing your bits do you purposely 'prepare' that day or do you do it a day or two before so you don't look like you care all that much? Who do you discuss these things with? Well I'm discussing it right now here with you and I can tell you categorically, the nurse, the doctor, the radiographer - they don't care!
Anyway pubic hair aside I'm moving on to an MRI now. A mass has been detected so further investigations are required.
"Hello Mrs Gaffney, please go into the changing room, remove all your clothes apart from your pants (underpants/knickers for my American readers) and put on this gown."
I do as I'm told.
I'm sitting back out in the waiting area and a nurse walks by and says
"Oh bless you, you can keep your shoes and socks on, I bet your feet are freezing"
"No they're fine, really" I say because the Romantic in me is not going to wear shoes and socks with said hospital gown. I'd rather have the cold feet. Yes, ok, vain! I'm not even sorry.
So for some hospital visits staying stylish is a challenge. Imagine this then. I'm planning for my oophorectomy (and cyst removal) and attend my pre-op. The nurse tells me I will need to remove nail varnish before my op. Fingers or toes, my choice. Oh, I'll keep my toes painted, I say, knowing that my sore tum isn't going to allow me the bending required to reach my toes for at least a month. Also my feet need all the extra colour they can get. "That's unusual" says the nurse. "Most women opt to keep their finger nails painted". And finally this brings me to the point of my post. My post op recovery will accommodate the repainting of my finger nails so that I can start to reinstate some semblance of normality. I don't mind that I won't be wearing makeup for my hospital stay nor that I don't really NEED to wear it right afterwards, well maybe a bit of lippy because it makes me feel better, but I do mind not having ANY sign of the authentic me at all.
So as I prepare for unpainted nails, unmade up face, functional hair updo, hospital gown I am thankful it's only an oophorectomy and not nearly what some poor souls have to endure and also that the hospital gown is at least in my colours.
Here's the not so vain bit. My recovery period will see me without my sanity holding HRT; it will see me with a sore tummy; excruciating post op wind in my shoulders; and I'll be restricted from lifting, driving and lots of my normal everyday activities. So if I want to paint my nails and put on some lippy I will do it! FACT - the sooner you start getting dressed after illness, operations or injuries the sooner you will recover. You won't believe how quickly the human being can deskill itself when lying in bed hour after hour day after day.
Doing just some of my normal everyday get up, dress up, show up routine will be magnified in importance in the next four weeks.
If you've read this far, thank you. Here are my top tips for staying stylish when you're not feeling it
Skincare
Keep your skincare routine going. Your face will thank you for it. Keep skin hydrated and cared for. Hospitals can be drying for your skin so even if you think you haven't been anywhere or done anything keep that routine; it's a good habit for the start and end of everyday. Your makeup free face can still look healthy and glowing as a result.
Hair
My curly headed acqaintances will know that it will become all too easy to resemble poor Bertha Antoinetta Mason if not effort is made in the hair department. I will be 'pineappling' whilst in bed and in preparation will make sure I have engaged in my weekly hair wash before my operation as a shower is not permitted for 48 hours afterwards. There are all sorts of hair adornments you can try out too if you wanted to.
Get dressed
Sounds simple doesn't it? The temptation can be to stay in your jimjams and whilst this is ok for a day or two you can quickly sink into a rut. Getting dressed helps your mindset recover as well as keeping your good habits in check. I've made sure all the laundry is up to date so that my comfiest items are available to me when I need them. I'll be reaching for elasticated waistbands and warm layers for the times my moving about is compromised.
Nails
Yes I've already said it. I'll be painting my nails not just because they look pretty but because it will be one thing that is within my control to do. In my healthcare years delivering a hand massage and nail painting was a very therapeutic and popular activity for our patients who otherwise could not do this for themselves.
Wear shoes
Even if you are going to be milling about the house more often than usual wear the shoes you wear normally. If you are Romantic like me the chances are you already wear your heels for a zoom meeting anyway. I'll be hoping to undertake some light work activity and I know I am at my most productive when I am dressed professionally. My slippers are not part of my professional look and are for end of the day relaxing.
Makeup
Yes I'll be putting it on as soon as I feel like it. Not for any visitors of the delivery guy but for me. I feel better. It's part of my routine. I'll do it to ready myself for the day. And if I do walk past the mirror on the landing I won't recoil at the tired old woman looking back at me.
Colour
You didn't think I'd get through a blog without it did you? When you wear colours that complement your natural skintone you WILL look healthier, fresher, younger even. When this happens you feel better. If you don't know your colours wear a colour that makes you feel good when you look at it. Then book yourself into my Colour Confidence session post haste! You'll thank me for it.
Get prepared
I don't actually know how I will be feeling when I first arrive home and for how long I will feel a bit meh. So spend some time before your hospital visit getting prepared. I already keep my skincare next to the bed. I stack this habit onto my bedtime routine so I don't forget. Make it as easy as possible for yourself. The night before my op I will put my nail kit next to the bed too. I have a lovely Cyberjammies dressing gown in my summer pinks and plums which I will have on the bed for my first day post op. I'll put my new Charlotte Tilbury Dancefloor Princess lippy with my skin care too. I'll have my phone to hand too so I can book in some treatments for when I am on the mend. Maybe some 'cheer me up' items will fall into my shopping basket too. Let's face it, there will be time to browse. I've made provisions so I can do this. Always stay within your budget.
So there you have it. It's not groundbreaking stuff but there are a few little things you can do hear and there to allow yourself to still feel like you. And vanity aside they will most certainly aid your recovery back to your version of normality. I'm about done now and ready to put my own advice into action.
Maybe there will be a post oophorectomy blog to come but for now I am officially OOO - out of office. See you on the other side.
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